Write Your Stories

One of the things I do with my dad is write his life history.  He has Parkinson's disease, and we never know how long he will be completely cognizant.  He has been wanting to write his story for a long time now.  My mom was helping him with the first part, and since her passing, I have taken it up with him.

Mom and Dad just before they were married

It's fun to hear his stories.  It's not unusual for Dad to be a little bit fuzzy in his thinking - mentally off-balance.  But when he remembers his past, the sparkle is back in his eye.  He talks faster than I can type, which isn't hard.  I ask questions to help him remember parts, and then he's off again.  I think writing down our stories actually helps us remember them better.  And there is the added benefit of being able to pass them along to future generations as well.  I don't think my own childhood would have been as rich without my favorite Little House on the Prairie books.

That's one reason I blog.  It forces me to write some of the little stories we create in our day-to-day living.  The good stories make me happy twice - once for the living it, and once (or more!) for the reading it.

Just for today, write down a story.  And then maybe find a notebook or folder on your computer where you can keep stashing more of your stories.  Yes, your stories are important, because YOU are!

Love My Dad

My dad is staying with us this weekend.  I love having him here.

About a month ago, we decided to alter Dad's schedule a little bit.  Dad has been forgetting the names of his grandkids.  So to give him a little bit more time with our kids, he comes to our house.  Every other week he spends the weekend with one of his other children.  I say "other" children, to differentiate me and three of my brothers from my fourth brother who lives in Dad's basement and helps care for him.  Very grateful for them.  I also know how caregiver burnout feels, so it's good for him and his little family to get a break as well.  Win for them, win for Dad, win for us.

I've always thought that it would be best to make good friends with my family members.  We believe that families will be forever, so I might as well like these people!  As it turns out, my best friends are my brothers and sisters-in-law.  How lucky I am.

Just for today, make an effort to connect with your extended family.  You will never know what joys are just waiting there for you.  Reaching out with real love can fill your heart.

Be Happy Through the Rain

We wanted to go camping, but the weather was not cooperative.  It was raining like crazy.

Good thing we took our whole house with us (thanks, wonderful neighbors of ours, for letting us borrow your wheels!).

But still, it was cold and wet and drippy and I was hoping so hard that the trip we had planned for so long wouldn't turn out to be miserable.  We were going camping, and hiking and rock climbing and playing in the great outdoors.  But we decided that we were still going, rain or not!  After a few hundred miles, we started to see this:

And then finally,  "fly-knee," as Freddie says it, we made it.  And it was beautiful after all.  So glad we didn't let a little rain stand in the way of our good time.

Just for today, press on through the rain.  And smile.  Even rain is beautiful!

Be Happy In Helping

Eddie brought a box home from cub scouts.  We're having a box derby relay at pack meeting next week, he explained, and I need to make this into a car.  OK.  I filed that thought away with too many other thoughts.  That's code for I forgot about it.

The week flew by, as they do around here.  Wednesday afternoon was particularly busy.  As I started to think about dinner, Eddie came up with the box.  "Alright Mom," he announced.  "Let's do it."  What?  Oh right.  The box for pack meeting.  But now??

I scrambled to clear the counter while scrambling to clear my thoughts.  I pretty much had to do this project with him.  I could be grumpy and tossing blame bombs, or I could choose to be happy and enjoy some time with my boy.  I chose happy.  It was a struggle.

But the more I tried to enjoy it, the more I did actually have a good time.  I really do like creative projects.  And I love spending time with my children.  I don't like feeling rushed, or doing things at the last minute.  But since that is where we were, I made the most of it.

We opened up his box, turned it inside out and reassembled it.  Then we spray-painted it white - with only one coat of paint since we didn't have to cover up the words.  We cut a hole in the top (bottom?), big enough for him to fit through.  He colored the lights while I made the windshield with more cardboard and aluminum foil.  The cut-out circle became the spare tire in the back, and he was ready to go.  He gave me a big hug, his face full of enthusiasm, and said "You're a great mom!  Thanks for helping me!"

At pack meeting, the cubs sat, in teams of 4, in the middle of the gym.  One member of each team ran  around the gym in stocking feet, then stopped in the middle to get their windshields washed (squirted in the mouth with a spray bottle) by their pit crew (team members).  After the next lap, they needed fuel (team members fed them a cupcake).  The runners were not allowed to do anything but hold their car (box).  After lap 3, they needed an oil change (they were fed a juice box).  After lap 4, they needed new tires (team members changed their socks).  Then the next team member would begin their four laps.  It was a great lesson in teamwork.  The boys had a great time.

And so did I.

Just for today, choose to be happy when you are helping someone - even if it isn't your first inclination.

Find Good Things

I've been thinking of product placement.  And Facebook ads.  And Google's new "privacy" policy.  I understand that advertising pays for a lot of what we consider "free."  Like radio.  And search engines.  And this blog.  So I appreciate that.

But for today, I'd like to go back to good-old sharing stories about things without worrying about whether we are holding the label facing outward, or getting compensation or perks from it.  This is not the Truman Show.

Because I'm going to tell you about a few of my favorite things in my medicine cabinet.  These things make my life a little bit better, and I've decided to recognize them and be happy about it.  Too many things are annoying, and make us frown.  Maybe we ought to get in the habit of smiling for good things.

This is my moisturizer - coconut oil.  I feel fancy when I say moisturizer instead of lotion.  I use it on my face and hands and I love it.  It's not slimy or greasy at all.  And it's cheaper than any moisturizer in the beauty department.  More love.

Burt's Bees lip balm is not as cheap as others we have in the house.  But it works, smells nice, and best of all, doesn't taste like chemicals.  I use it all the time - see how the print is worn off the tube?  I have to hide it from the twins, who like to each chapsticks.  Eat the cheap ones, small fry.  Not Mommy's.

This one makes me laugh at myself.  I don't necessarily love this toilet paper.  But I do like the wrapper.  The swirls make me happy.  Maybe one day I'll paint my bathroom in swirls like this.  Then I'd smile every time I went in there.

Just for today, take a look in your cupboards and drawers and notice the products that you really like.  Maybe even smile at them!

Feel Vindicated

I just read the funniest article.  I know it won't be funny to everyone.  But it was funny to me.  And poignant.

I graduated from college when I was 6 months pregnant.  We had been married for a year.  I know, quick - but that's what was right for us.  My husband had one more semester to go before he was done.  I was too blah and uncomfortable to go out and get a job or anything, so I just stayed home in our little apartment.  I read books and slept a lot, and sewed baby clothes.  I remember being bored and feeling yucky and wondering what I had gotten myself into.  What am I going to do all day as a stay-at-home mom?  I wondered about that often.  I soon found out.

Raising children takes a lot more time than I thought it would.  Mommying is hard work.  Sometimes nasty, sometimes joyful, sometimes frantic, sometimes boring, but oh-so-gratifying.

So when I read this article titled "You're a stay-at-home mom?  What do you DO all day?"  I was interested.

I loved it.  I read and re-read it.  And then I had to read it to my husband who was groggily stumbling out of the bedroom after hunkering down for a few days with the man-flu.  He was nice enough to listen and not fall asleep while I was reading.  Thanks, dear.

I came away from the article feeling grateful that someone else gets me.  I'm understood.  I'm important.  My role as a mother is critical for the health of our society.  And it felt good.  I'm not trying to say that non-stay-at-home-non-moms aren't important.  Quite the opposite.  We're all beneficial.  Really.  Unless you live off a government grant that has you collecting elephant poop.  But maybe then you are important to the elephants, so you're good.

So today, do an internet search of something you like to do, and read up on the latest articles (they doesn't even have to be peer-reviewed) that prove you are worthwhile.  I bet you'll find something.  You love quilting?  You are an important part of America's cultural heritage.  Are you into marketing?  Society needs you.  Are you a grandparent?  "The government needs to rethink the policy implications" of your "positive role."  Are you a manager?  Your role is critical.  You like shopping on Main Street? Your hometown economy depends on you.

Don't be cynical.  Just take it as a little boost for the day.  It might even make you share an article or two.

BTW, Man flu is real.  I'm not making it up.  I feel vindicated.

Just for today, google (or bing or yahoo or whatever you do) "my interest/job/hobby/calling" important (like "librarians important") and see what comes up.  And then feel vindicated.  And important - 'cuz you are!

Repair Work

As I've been thinking a lot about depression this week, it's easy to feel like you are broken, not fixable, not worth anything.  Not so.  NOT SO!

I came across this article about the ancient Japanese art of fixing broken pottery.  It's called kintsukuroi or kintsugo.  In the process, not only is it successfully put back together, but becomes more valuable.  Imagine being more worthwhile because you were once broken.

Please read the post.  It is beautiful.  You can read more about it here and here.

A last quote from Jeffrey Holland's talk, "Like a Broken Vessel:"

   Though we may feel we are “like a broken vessel,” as the Psalmist says (Psalms 31:12), we must remember, that vessel is in the hands of the divine potter. Broken minds can be healed just the way broken bones and broken hearts are healed. While God is at work making those repairs, the rest of us can help by being merciful, nonjudgmental, and kind.
   I testify of the holy Resurrection, that unspeakable cornerstone gift in the Atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ! With the Apostle Paul, I testify that that which was sown in corruption will one day be raised in incorruption and that which was sown in weakness will ultimately be raised in power. I bear witness of that day when loved ones whom we knew to have disabilities in mortality will stand before us glorified and grand, breathtakingly perfect in body and mind. What a thrilling moment that will be!

Just for 15 minutes today, envision yourself as a valuable vessel adorned with ribbons of gold.  You are beautiful!