...sorry...

I so dislike the phrase, "I'm sorry."  Somehow we have gotten so past the point of acknowledging another person's feeling that we think two simple words can cover a multitude of bad behaviors without needing to do anything to fix the problem or change our comportment.  It does nothing to appease the injuries of the one offended, or to assure that the wrong won't happen again.

When my children have misbehaved and I have tried to teach them to apologize, they fling the word at each other like a weapon , causing additional harm with its cutting tone.  I've even heard, "SoREEE!  Ya happy now?!?"  It's not working.

So when I recently came across this article at cuppacocoa, I was encouraged.  It talks about a proper apology needing four different parts.  I'd even tack on a fifth: What can I do to make it better?

We went over this in Family Home Evening on Monday night, and we've had some good success with it so far.  Today, Georgie was throwing a stuffed penguin when it lodged on top of the living room fan blades.  Good throw, really.  Angel tried to get it down by throwing heavy pillows at it, and succeeded in breaking off one of the fan blades!  The penguin nonchalantly watched all the drama from his safe perch.  After the hubbub died down, I took Angel in to see Opa and explain what she had done.  It is his house we are living in, after all.  It was hard for her, but she managed to make the whole apology and did a fine job of it.

That was a whole lot better than a muttered "sorry," and it is starting to make a difference in this house.