Dizzy

Today I  was dizzy.  I felt rushed, spinning and swirling around in tight circles.  At every urgent turn, I only saw the same things I saw last time.  Hurry, whirl, dash, repeat.  Around and around I spiraled, always going, but never getting anywhere.

I took the hose out to water the new saplings we just planted.  I turned the water down and let it fill up the moat around the little tree, to give it a long, deep drink.  I watched the water tumbling down, bubbling, picking up random bits of grass and carrying them along.  The little stream ran and swirled, and a tiny eddy caught my eye.  A tan bit of something was floating in circles, without a way out.  I realized that I've been feeling like I was racing in circles, stuck in an eddy, taking on water, slowly drowning.  Blue.

In the afternoon, I ran out of the house to drive the elementary school carpool.  I rushed around the corner of the van, still feeling blue, and saw this: the first rose of the year.  It stopped me in my tracks.

This bit of beauty was the tender mercy I needed to remind me that the Lord loves me.  I stared for a few moments in spite of my need to hurry.  The longer I looked, the more loveliness I saw.

Boy, those roses smell sweet.  

Thanks, Lord.